Friday, 11 January 2019

The Pettiness of the Human Being

You know what would suck? You are now on number eleven of your cycle of afterlives, blessed be for those who have managed to experience that many lives, perhaps within a couple thousand-year periods. I mean I myself do not know for I am not God. Anyway, the blessings of reincarnation have for the eleventh time, blessed upon your soul and your spirit for you are one truly lucky candidate to have the privilege of experiencing this many lives up to this point.

Image result for cliche human pictures

But something, however, something isn’t quite right. You realise a certain unfamiliarity with your surroundings, the way you feel, the way you see and the way you breathe on the Earths warm surface. The realisation does not hit you instantaneously, yet once you are aware that you’ve been reincarnated as an American Bullfrog, you suddenly feel a sense of unrequited vulnerability. You feel a great betrayal from your friend, the universe and he’s sitting there laughing, mocking you. And there isn’t really much you can do. What if for the ten lives prior to this one, which you are now about to embark on, you’d been a terrible, terrible person. This was your punishment. A massive middle finger from the world, the earth, the universe, signed, sealed and delivered straight to you, and there wasn’t shit you could do about it as you are so mundane and insignificant. Your insignificance is now radiating off you and it’s scary. Hawks fly above you, whilst Alligators lurk within your new space of habitat. Fuck, were you even a human being in any of your lives before? Fuck knows, and who cares? Arguably, there is probably a long list of more degrading species one could be reincarnated as but I mean goddamn it, what had you done that was so bad in your previous life/lives to experience such a denigration within the hierarchy of living and breathing things. Yes, you are most definitely a living and breathing being – which is a blessing – but as you sit there, gaping with the huge pair of eyes as a ‘lithobates catesbeianus’, well shit you know. Hopefully I pray that none of those reading this become cursed within their lives to come. Hell, I might have even jinxed myself for coming up with this scenario. But, I guess we’ll just have to wait and see. The point being, that it would fucking suck.

Life is a truly wonderful, beautiful thing.
Image result for lifeImage result for life

It takes no Jesus Christ to realise that life is a notion that we as human beings take for granted, in every way possible. Waking up every morning, oh, alive and breathing, blinking, feeling, eroticising, fantasising, every second of it all is a blessing as our chances of actually being alive and here, are minimal. And man, is there a hell of a lot to do whilst being alive in this world. Places to go, humans to meet. Humans have taken upon their own curiosities to now go even beyond what we see and feel on this earth, by exploring outer space, going to Mars etc. Did you know that 83% of planets have yet to have been discovered yet?

A sad truth however, is that not all of us are equally born with the commodities and virtues of what it means to be human. Some of us are born with physical birth defects, behavioural distortions, additional sexual organs. In the light of some, such as Stevie Wonder who was more or less, born blind, a person could not allow this hindrance to prevent them from living a fruitful live– Young Stevie grew up to become a virtuosic and successful musician. However, take one individual, Joseph Merrick, or more popularly known by beautiful humans as ‘The Elephant Man’. This is a man for who the majority of his life, was ostracised simply due to his physical appearance, thus for the Victorian public to label him as one that resembles an elephant, as opposed to a human being. And I guess for the majority of his life, I can imagine that he was treated like an animal, dying at the age of 27 – one of the earlier members for those who know. He allegedly spent just one night sleeping on his side, as for once, he wanted to experience what it was for a human being without facial deformities to sleep, only for this to induce a prevention of blood flow going to his brain and, his death due to asphyxiation. I’m no scientist so I cannot explain to you the entire process of how the man died but I mean goddamn, it’s pretty whack. But in a way, he was now free, free from all the mockery and dehumanisation that he had received his whole life, from such petty and narrow-minded individuals whom dare I even refer to as ‘human’. Perhaps this spirit of Joseph Merrick now lives on in a great individual within today’s world, perhaps Elon Musk or Donald Trump. Or maybe his spirit lies within you, or me.

One thing for me that makes life such a wonderful thing is the overall meaningless and pointlessness of it. The fact that any kind of theory, idea, belief, religion, establishment and sex position has been derived and created by us, humankind. Yet the answers that we so desperately and constantly thrive to find, are non-existent. On a smaller scale, we engulf ourselves within problems and issues that really do not need to be made into a big deal, or any kind of deal at all yet it’s in our nature. Issues are a part of what it is to be human, all being part of what I’ve coined as, ‘a hierarchy of human issues’. When you were a small child, it was the end of the world when you’d impetuously, stupidly kicked the ball over the fence into the neighbour’s garden and now had to burden up the courage to ask for your ball back. Ten years along the line, it became the end of the world when you found out that the girl you believed had a real, genuine connection with, had been cheating on you for a year with her pet dog, Yusef. Twenty years into the future and after a happy life of mortgages, failed relationships, unreached goals and numerous more unfulfillments and disappointments, just when you think you’ve found a spark within this new ‘different’ woman whom ‘there’s no one on Earth like’, well let’s just say little Richard dies on you at the perfect moment and before you know it, she’s moved on to a hunkier and more ‘sexually able’ individual.
Image result for depression

The most reassuring thing in the world for me is knowing that any kind of terrible thing that can happen in my life is so small, and insignificant within the bigger scheme of the world, everything that has existed and everything that will continue to exist. Every humiliating moment will be forgotten and I mean the worse that could happen is the story of how you threw up at the family New Year’s Party, will soon become a fable, a story within the future years to come amongst my great great great great great great great great great grandchildren. And who knows how the story may have evolved by that point? By 2719 AD, it could be so distorted that the story no longer even has any resemblance to the original topic. Fuck, these kids are talking about how some dude in their family history went toe to toe with a wild boar named Raymond and defeated him with the use of telekinetic energy – on New Year’s Eve.

So, to conclude, you know don’t get mad if ma is telling you to clean your room for once, or if your boss is an asshole, or if your breasts aren’t big enough – it doesn’t matter and will never matter because you’re irrelevant af anyway. Humans are great creatures, but horribly petty creatures and man you know if World War 3 ensues through the likes of a trivial and negligible Twitter feud between the US and North Korea, yeah, a few bombs will get thrown, couple million dead but no biggy. Doesn’t really mean shit and its petty as hell anyway. Petty fucking war. So, to counteract this pettiness, one must tend an optimistic approach to life, making stoicism your best friend and just getting the fuck on with it.
Image result for mr t

Here’s a poem written by one of my favourite people to ever exist, Plato;
‘Let’s not cry, let’s stay alive, because dying is only sleeping forever,
Let us be and we shall be free, let me know what it means to be me,
Such simplicity, electricity, turn off the lights open up and so we,
Can just learn to let go, through sun and through snow,
Stop telling these lies, grow with tranquillity,
Leaves upon branches, such views, different stances,
The words have been written, and the alphabet too,
Yet its flowing and flowing, almost is something, new,
Can’t deny I must feel, I must love, yet renew,
Wish not to be fake, wish only to make,
My people happy, why can’t they be happy,
I’m sappy, your sassy, like leaches, just latching,
I don’t mean to bother,
Or hover around,
I forget that you’re blind, can’t see what you’ve found,
We’re breaking, not tearing, my conscience is glaring,
Only too long must it have been since this intimate sharing.’

Tuesday, 3 May 2016


The world is congested with opinion. Every single individual present within the 'Great Planet Earth' and the other fifteen-hundred thousand planets, galaxies and solar systems has their own personal opinions on particular topics. Every single individual is entitled to their own opinions. Opinions are constant. 'This song is better than that song'. 'This movie is better than that movie'. 'This video is funnier than that, this is hilarious, not that!' 'Drake is a better songwriter than Mozart'. 'No wait, Drake IS Mozart'. 'Tottenham are a better team than Arsenal'. 'Ronaldo is a better player than Messi'. 'He is cleverer than him'. 'My girlfriend is hotter than your girlfriend'. 'Keith gives better dick than Brad', and so on and so forth. Even the first three sentences of this post are arguably, my own opinions. And throughout this post, you may pick up on frequent expression of opinion coming from myself.

Opinions tend to be subjective. People may find that they disagree with other people's opinions. Or they may feel as if their opinion is just plain 'wrong'. Just like the many Beatles fans all around the world, who disagreed with John Lennon's statement about the Beatles being 'bigger than Jesus'. Or the big ol' slave masters who disagreed with the fact that 'Negroes' should get treated like 'normal' people (that is, when they got to have their own say anyway). Or the hundreds of thousands of people who disagreed with the opinions of great great, fantastically amazing revolutionary people such as Dr. Martin Luther King, Mahatma Gandhi, Malcolm X (otherwise known as El Hajj Malik El-Shabazz) or Adolf Hitler. Opinions come in all shapes and sizes and can come forth for use within an absolutely extraordinary range of different topics. However, even the most delicate of topics such as - dare I say - religion and homosexuality, are filled with conclusions that have been concluded via some kind of opinion or belief. Even the most simplest of statements are merely opinions; 'God is real', 'It is okay to be Gay'.

Now, to many, the idea of God not being real is somewhat taboo. Like the thought of Gods existence being a belief and not a fact, should not even cross one's mind. But that's the thing, whether people like it or not - or know it or not - the existence of God, or some kind of God IS a belief, an opinion. There is zero conclusive evidence to prove that God is real. In simple terms, and perhaps not the most grammatically correct ways of putting it but you get my point; God is an opinion.

Although, I personally, am the primary representation of what one may label as a 'hypocrite'. I believe in God. However, my belief is a sort of reluctant belief in the sense that it's more of a 'just to be on the safe side' kind of thing. Because let's face it, we don't know. You can argue that it's wrong to think the way I do but I mean, just in case God IS sitting there amongst the heavens staring down at you whilst you're scrolling through 'TeensLoveHorses.Net', trying to find that video you watched last Wednesday after school whilst you were meant to be studying for your Biology exam, mocking your sadness and lonliness as you can't, and never will get a girl of your own, I want to be on the safe side of things. I don't want to forever rot within the pits of hell for all eternity wishing that I actually gave the 23 pence of lose change that I had sitting comfortably within the realms of my left pocket to the poor beggar outside every Morrisons. With the narrow possibility of changing his/her life forever.
But at the end of the day, we don't know. Nobody knows. The sooner people can understand that, the easier life will be for everyone. You'll see. Then again, you probably won't ever see because people are narrow-minded and ignorant.

I have always felt as if whenever I've attempted to publicly express my opinions, especially on Social Media – primarily Facebook – I feel as if I've always caused some sort of controversial outburst or argument in which usually involves me and another stupid human being. But that's the thing, opinions are made to be challenged, there is no right or wrong answer with opinions, because an opinion is an opinion, not a fact. I don't think I'm better or smarter than anyone for thinking a particular thing, it's just what I think.

This next section is what I call a 'Bohemian Rhapsody', a sudden change in topic and tone.

At the end of the day, the opinions of a human being make up the type of person they are. However not everyone is what they seem to be or come across as. Everybody has their own personal problems and struggles, including myself. I have always – well not exactly always, but have thought for a while now – gone with the thought that 'you are not alone in your suffering'. Nobodys life is perfect and even though you may feel as if your life is awful, you are going through complete shit and your problems are the worst thing in the world, as hard as it may seem to believe, there are always people around you going through just as much shite as you whether you know it or not. That may seem like a very generic thing to say but trust me, those are words to live by. Everyone's going through shit, everyone is suffering in their own way and life is not meant to be perfect or easy. In fact when you think about it that way, without any kind of thing getting in the way or issue, life would be boring? Empty, perhaps.

Whether the struggles and stresses are to do with work, family, education, health, mental health, learning difficulties, past troubles, relationships, physical pain or society in general, I repeat, everyone is struggling, embed that into your brain. 'Oh he's good looking, he's head boy, he's head of the football and rugby team, he's popular, he's 6'1 and well built, he's got a girl, oh, and he's musically talented as well?! Damn, I'm nothing.' Well I'm sure behind all that glitz and glamour, good looks and a 3.1 inch penis.

And of course that is an exaggeration but you see my point? There will always be something with everyone. Someone who on the outside is smiling all the time, brash, loud, vibrant and funny, off-screen, could really be spiralling deep within a world of their own depression, suffering non-stop everyday of their miserable life, putting on a fake personality just to make them seem like a 'normal' human being to everyone around them, to ensure that they gain acceptance and some sort of identity, but not only towards their peers, but towards themselves as well.

But then again, no one really likes someone who is overly serious or quiet. Girls are usually attracted to someone loud, or not necessarily loud but someone funny, someone who entertains the whole class, that guy with enthusiasm and energy, charisma, someone who seems like they're happy and content and maybe with a sense of edginess or thrill. Not necessarily someone 'bad' but someone who isn't too bothered about the unnecessary things in live and just lives. And not even just girls, everyone, everyone likes someone who is funny and high-spirited. But something I've always noticed within other people – and in some cases myself, but I'm a little more complicated as I don't see myself as having a set personality, I've always been a cross between an introvert and an extrovert – many who are like this are covering up or hiding away from their own personal battles and use this as a kind of method of self-reassurance.

And I'm sure on many occasions when some of these people have actually opened up about their true selves to others, the kind of response they may have received may have been something like 'Yeah but there's others who have it worse than you'. Or that they have 'no reason to be upset' or depressed. And it's statements like that which really get me. I mean sure, there's always someone who has it worse than you. But what people need to realise and have fully embedded into their thick skulls is that everyone is different – everyone's life, personality, views, appearance, way of thinking, take on life, everyone differs from one an other, there isn't such thing as something 'normal'. The term 'normal' is a term invented by society to help us all feel as if there is some kind of right answer to life in general when in actual fact, there is no right or wrong answer as we're all so bloody different and the term 'normal' is a ridiculous and heavily subjective term. Everyone's traits vary and they all apply differently to that specific individual.

You can't say for instance a multi-millionare with a nice, big mansion and 13 different cars can't have feelings of depression and suicidal thoughts as there are 'children in Africa who are starving' or 'Syrian refugees suffering to stay alive' who have it worse than them. You got to even it out. The way everyone takes things differs from person to person and the way someone may be affected by a certain situation may differ. I mean sure, you could say that the starving children have it awful and they are suffering pretty horendously as they haven't got much of a chance living in less-economically-developed countries but thats not the way it works. If the issue the person is facing is affecting them and causing them trouble and making their life difficult, then it is important to themselves. No one ever has 'no reason to be depressed'. It doesn't work like that.

But the bottom line is, do not judge a book by its cover. Now I've just said a shitload of cliché things which really isn't me at all and I don't think I've sworn once throughout this so fuckcuntbitchshitbastardwankdickheadassholeholeass and peace. 

Sunday, 28 February 2016

Dumb Trends, Dumb Society, You're All Idiots.

Well, where can I start?

We are in the year 2016. Us as human beings and as an entire human race, have come so incredibly far and everyday, are continuously striving to go even further, beyond our expected limits. We have clobbered through an extremely difficult, tedious, tiresome, eventful, yet I guess, rewarding journey of life and have found ourselves in a position in which we can look at our world around us and smile, smile a large and fulfilling smile of sheer integrity and be proud. Proud of how far we have come as human beings. We no longer take the mere title as 'homo sapiens' and have managed to live through the stone ages, overcome the ice ages, battle through the middle ages, and make it through all the other ages - I don't exactly know all the others, what do I look like a fucking historian to you? Do I seem as if I even care or give a fucking damn about fucking dinosaurs and fucking cave men and fucking Adam and fucking Eve (from a Christian perspective anyway). I'm simply using the overused and cliche tactic of  deliberately prolonging an introduction to make myself sound like an optimistic and acceptable representation of a human being and establish myself as the kind of blogger I am (as this is my first post after all) only to then shock you with something I consider radical and outrageous with the hope that you agree with my extremely opinionated as well as subjective point-of-view.  I mean were human beings even around during the ice age? No one bloody knows and no body fucking cares, I mean they teach us this shit in primary school but who even actually fucking-

Off topic. Did you laugh? Because that was supposed to be funny and make you laugh. It's something called humour. One thing that our society and our world today knows absolutely fuck all about.

If you have the ability to - and quote year 7 English - 'read between the lines', then you'd probably have guessed that at some point, I was going to make reference to the fact that our society (well, Western society, I don't really know too much in regards to the Muhammad way of life) should in no way at all be 'proud of how far we've come as human beings'. This man comes across as the ideal representation in support of this statement...
But lets leave poor Trumpy alone, I think we're a bit too hard on this poor man, give him a chance for Christs sake. I mean sure you know, he has his views, but isn't everyone entitled to their own opinions? So if that means building a wall to prevent all the Muslims or Mexicans from coming in to his beloved nation or whatever the fuck the old fart yabbers on about then sure, be my guest, no ones judging you. As they always embed into our brains from a young age; you must follow your dreams and follow what your heart tells you to do and anyone who vows to argue or disagree with that statement is simply, well, just as bad as the Devil himself. 

But enough of Trump and lets gets back to the original point. Lets talk about how our society is in turmoil and the way in which it finds entertainment through the most ridiculous and frankly, unfunniest of things. Lets talk about trends. 

Since the day social media became a thing and young people began to give their lives up in hopes of tracing that video they found on 'My Russian' last Friday night whilst Mum went for a girls night out with her single, miserable and middle-aged acquaintances, internet trends and just general trends have always played a massive role in the ways in which we communicate with each other and entertain one an other. In a way, they are what make our society, our society. They're a way in which we feel as if we have some kind of purpose to live. For example, you could be getting ready to go out with your four-man 'squad' on a Saturday night. Three of you have arrived at the point in which you are supposed to have met and you're all stood there waiting for the fourth member of the squad in your 'fresh crep' - or for those who speak English, Nike Air Force Ones. Then suddenly, the fourth member of your squad finally appears, however, you all notice an anomaly in the way he is dressed. Black Nike hoodie? Check. Black Nike Trousers? Check. A snapback pointing in a backward direction? - NOT forward. Check. Seems alright. All is good...but wait. There is just one thing wrong with the way in which he is dressed. As he is stood there glaring into the menacing eyes of you and your two companions, most likely unaware of the fact that he is wearing Ugg Boots, not Air Forces, you all look at each other and suddenly, a moment of tension and realization is felt. There is a silence. Who's going to be the one to say it? And suddenly, it happens. Raheem squats down glaring at Abdi-Salaams shoes and yells the inevitable line, 'WHAT ARE THOSE!?' Chuckles ensue then the four members return back to life, reminiscing on the reference to the internet trend which has suddenly came forth for use in a real life situation. 

If you know me, and know me well, minus my incredibly short temper, you'd know that I take years and years to get the point. Which I am still doing now. I haven't got to the point. The main point. I'm wasting your time. Stop reading. 

Well, congrats because you've continued to read on and you've now reached 'The Angry Bloggers point'. That was also an attempt to be funny. You're meant to laugh. Laugh then. 

Because you're a member of this society, you're an idiot. And because you're an idiot, you're not laughing now and that means you most likely haven't been laughing at any of the little puns and flashes of humour iv'e been throwing in now and again. Well, you know what? You know what you may find funny because you're an idiot? This. 

You enjoyed that right? Fucking hilarious weren't it? I mean what on this earth could possibly be funnier than a handsome teenage boy called Daniel, who's continuously showing how he is most definitely 'back at it again with the white vans' - see what I did there - and a spine tinglingly amusing cameraman repeatedly yelling...this is the grand moment you've all been waiting for, I'm finally going to say it, the line, I'm gonna say it, here it goes....

Well fuck you all I'm not going to say it. I mean you just heard it in the video 10 times so why would it make any kind of difference whatsoever if you read it? You're reading this in your head are you not? Won't feel as if you've achieved anything by reading the dreaded words rather than hearing them. 

Lets face it. This video is not funny. This trend is not funny. The majority of trends are not funny. It pisses me the fuck off. I can't lie, some throughout the 17 years of my life, I actually have found rather humorous, but generally, they're ridiculous and the fact that they are so ridiculous, is what makes them funny (most of the time). How anyone even aloud this to be a thing goes beyond me. And if that's what is considered as 'funny', then it just goes to show that anything can be funny. Anything. I could put up a picture of a lemon and expect you to laugh at it because I mean, that shits fucking hilarious. Its yellow for crying out loud. Doesn't that just make you want to shit yourself with laughter, literally? In fact, the first time I watched this video, I saw it from someone who shared it on social media and thought I might take a look at it but instead found myself increasingly unsatisfied and am glad to say that I watched it with the most straightest possible face ever. I think there must have been a point in the video where I tried to force myself to laugh at it because I mean, I just felt sorry for the poor lads. Well it came out as a cough and I choked a bit. Not relevant...The dudes voice is quite funny I have to say but only worthy of a couple of claps, not really a chuckle. When you actually look at it from a bigger perspective, you begin to understand that it's quite sad actually. Seriously. 

So society, people, human beings, you can all take a fucking bow for ever allowing this shit, and many other shits, for ever becoming a thing. And it makes me seethe with rage when I notice the types of things that become famous, well-known and trendy in this world because the majority of them are just ridiculous, no, ridonkulous. You can call me 'jealous' but tell me what the fuck there is to be jealous about. Personally, I know I'm not that funny and have been continuously told that I am only funny when I put no effort into making the other person laugh. But the world is becoming stupider by the day.  I mean the other day, someone labelled me as a 'fuckboy' simply due to me being lightskinned and because of my haircut. Well, it was actually a while ago, but it still makes me pissed off...but lets leave lightskinned stereotypes for another article. That's called giving a 'sneak peak' for those of you who don't know.  

You know what. I'm done. Fucking done. Nuff writing for me. I'm gonna end with the textbook, 'please leave a comment and tell me what you think' and feel free to call me a hypocrite and leave me with a whole bunch of sad attempts to contradict the points I made in my blog but remember, don't judge me and only God can judge me. Here's a picture of a lemon: